1,2,3 DRINK

 

bar_bottles

 

I’m not sorry,

Sorry that I want more for myself than to be drunk every other day and not remember my name, sorry that I don’t enjoy falling over myself and puking my insides out. Sorry that I care about my body, it’s the only one I’ve got. Sorry that I can have fun without being drunk. Sorry that I really don’t want the extra weight from alcohol, the scale is scary enough. Sorry that one beer/drink is enough for me. Sorry that I won’t drink something that taste utterly disgusting just to get buzzed.

 

Actually,

I’m not sorry, why should I be? For wanting to be able to remember my memories instead of having people re-tell me the stories. For taking care of the only body I have? For wanting to enjoy the people around me? For not wanting to end up in compromising positions all because my inhibitions were through the window?

I’m not sorry for being different, I’m not sorry for not being drunk every weekend.

 

Be good to yourself, always!

 

XOXODani

Commuting Chronicles… 7 Lessons I have learned

Fashion-Ave-Subway

 

Having lived in New York for a number of years now, one would think commuting would be second nature to me, right? WRONG!

I never really had to commute to the city and be on a strict time schedule before, so now that I’m attending NYU I’m learning the ins and outs of waiting on a bus and running for trains.

&&

Here are the 7 things I’ve learned so far….

 

  1. You will hear conversations that make you wish the Earth would open up and at that point it doesn’t matter who is swallowed. For example today I heard some high schoolers talking about Lexi…. “ Lexi has a strong odor, but she makes all the guys hit it” “ Remember when she told us how he fingered her “ should I even bother to mention that Lexi’s cousin was part-taking in this conversation.
  2. The people sleeping and falling over on you really have no control over this. I haven’t been a culprit of this yet but I empathize. I just think they wake up super early and though you’re only sitting or standing, that’s just it! The fact that you aren’t doing anything the sleep that you left behind comes to take you out!
  3. Now, let’s demolish the thought that New Yorkers are mean! Almost everyday others and myself offer up our prize location, being our seats to the elderly and/ or pregnant women.
  4. If you’re on a strict time commute leaving 3 mins late will make you LATE! My friend typically leaves her home at 7:00am and if she leaves at 7:03am she might as well take the day off. Never in life did 3 mins matter more.
  5. Your train will be held momentarily because of train traffic ahead. Yes train traffic exists so I recommend giving yourself a few mins to spare. You need those 3 mins!
  6. Pay attention to the train you run onto. That seems like common sense but really you never know when a train is making different stops/detours. I take the E train from the first stop to the last stop everyday but somehow the train I caught today was not going to my usual last stop. A simple transfer usually rectifies this.
  7. While there are some people who are really in need, sometimes you find a guy who isn’t so truthful. This guy in particular solicits on the 6 train, his story? His 2-month-old granddaughter was shot by a stray bullet and his family needs assistance with funeral arrangements. What I don’t know is if his granddaughter did in fact get shot. What I do know is that he has been using this same story for months going years. Within the time frame nothing has changed, I have literally heard the exact story months apart.

XOXODANI

 

 

Where the heck have I been ?

Image

 

 

So I’m just gonna jump right in and apologize, seriously its been way too long…. I know…but please forgive me.

 

By my 15 yr old calculations I was suppose to be slaving over med school right about now and I was well on my way except, I realized that while I have the abilities its simply not what I want to do for the rest of my life.

&&

I have recently begun a new journey one I may be a little too excited about! I can’t even believe it’s happening but still so humbled to even have a chance. The industry I am aiming to join is tough but I know I was made for it, I won’t spell it out for you but perhaps if you search the hashtag #danireads on Instagram you may be able to figure it out? Let me know in the comments hehe.

 

Work really had me exhausted and though my bank account is always on alert since I quit.

&&

My commute is now an hour and a half, it just feel right does that sound terrible? Oh well it does! My exhaustion is now happy exhaustion if that even exists. Gah! I have homework I should totally be doing but I simply could not stay away any longer. I hope you didn’t give up on me becauseeeeeee I’m baccckkkkk!

 

See you soon and I mean that !!

 

XOXOD

Are your flaws real or imagined?

Whaddup???

 

I mean hiiiiii, hello, bonjour, hola!

 

I hope you all had a great week!

 

 Image

Lets jump into it! BOOM!

I work in the healthcare field and I see some crazy people on a day-to-day basis literally! 

 

&& perhaps this is why I have a major issue of concern that hurts my heart and I’m so serious, it really does.

I hope you want to know what it is, either way I’m going to share…

 

BODY DYSMORPHIA, yes a flaw that is either minor or imagined. But to the person, their appearance seems so shameful that they don’t want to be seen by anyone.

When you have body dysmorphic disorder, you intensely obsess over your appearance and body image, often for many hours a day. Your perceived flaw causes you significant distress, and your obsession impacts your ability to function in your daily life. You may seek out numerous cosmetic procedures or excessively exercise to try to “fix” your perceived flaw, but you’re never satisfied.

 

Now I don’t personally know anyone that suffers severely (although one friend may slightly be getting off her rocker) from this but just last week I saw a teenager, if I recall correctly she was sixteen, she came to get her medication then asked for a certain type of pills I cant remember the name, that would help speed up her metabolism because she wanted to lose weight. SO I looked at her keenly, she wasn’t overweight by no means and you could tell she was insecure by the way she carried herself. Whatever happened to good ole exercise and clean eating?

 

People out here, getting crazy talking about body wraps and all kinds of stuff. Please save your money go buy fruits and veggies, no pill, no wrap, is gonna last forever. Everyone can’t look the same, love yourself for who you are. If you are overweight take the necessary steps to better yourself. If you aren’t but think you are… Girl go eat some bacon but drink water LOL.

 

&&

 

I’m not gonna sit behind my laptop and act like I have it all together when it comes to my body image. I do often relapse and think I’m oh so fat, but thank God for my support system full of members who will literally slap some sense into me. You see me exercising and eating healthy, let me assure you it isn’t to lose weight, I am maintaining a healthy lifestyle cause I have no intentions to live on medications in my old age. I am taking preventative measures so that I will be able to have longevity.

 

&&

 

Remember this, health is wealth.

 

XOXOD

Perfect Timing…

I feel like I have neglected you all! Forgive me…

Y’all still love me right? Hehe

Image

Some of you may know I recently and finally got a job, my first real job! It was such a big deal in my house my mom was like” I should go with you, its like your first day of prep school” side eye, she didn’t come though, Thank God. All my family members were calling to wish me well; it was all too much lol.

I grew up hearing older folks say “Nothing happens before God’s time” or “God’s timing is perfect” and I have always, took it lightly but it’s a serious fact of life.

&&

I had been applying for jobs ALLLL SUMMER long, literally. Some of my friends would joke and say that I really didn’t want a job because I would at the last minute not go to an interview or refused to apply to certain places.

BUT GOD…

Nothing happens before time…. ALL SUMMER I had houseguest, when one set boarded the plane another set was landing. I am now a pro at navigating JFK International Airport and if you know what I know it can be confusing as crap!

That goes to say that I spent most of my time entertaining others and not having much time to really look about personal things.

When I got the call and the email for the interview for the job, I knew it had to be some superior power aligning the stars for me, because chile I didn’t even apply to that location, I had randomly called but they had just got done hiring and so I thought that was it. However fortunately for me things didn’t work out with one of the new hires and that’s where I came in.

I took the last set of houseguest to the airport at 12am on September 2nd for their 2 am flight, and went to work 12:30pm on the third.

Had I been working during the summer I would not have been able to be a good host and being the introvert that I am, I would have been real miserable with people in my space when I come home late and just want to scroll through IG, read then sleep and in that order!

This is all to say, that we really need to exercise faith and though it’s easier said than done, worrying does us no good ever. Just allow your steps to be ordered.

XOXOD

Gah, Impulsive shopping!

images-20

Hey guys!!

It’s Monday, and I know most of you are ready for the day to be over, in due time my friends…in due time.

As I write this post I’m hoping that you are all at least a little better than I am in this area…. How many of you go into Target, Walmart, CVS, Walgreens etc for one item and come out with many bags hours later??? *raises hand proudly *  I absolutely lovveeeee pharmacies like LOVE them!

But they don’t love me, you see those little last minute set ups at the register and dollar sections are not love, at least not to my bank account!

&&

Listen, there is no shame in my game! I admit I have a major problem, I recently went to get ONE item that costs about five dollars, at the register my bill came to $65 dollars to say I was shocked was an understatement.

I have got to do better and if you’re like me, WE have got to do better!

&&

All this unnecessary impulsive shopping is not IT!

Now, my grandma would say “money was made to be spent” which is true but check her bank account and it doesn’t seem like she practices what she preaches LOL. She’s so good at saving; I figure I will inherit that trait later in life as I mature.

I wanted to share some tips that may help us combat this chronic impulsive shopping habit:

  • If you go for one item, do not get a cart or basket, this limits how much you can pick up.
  • Go directly to the aisle of the item you came for. I often stray into the hair care aisle just to “look”
  • Decipher your wants vs your needs. Do you really NEED that Nutella ? I know its good but what does the scale say? LOL
  • Make a list of necessary items before you go in and stick to it!

Let me know if these help and if you have any suggestions, suggest away!

XOXO,

Dani

Take care of you!

Image

My summer has been really busy and unfortunately it has been busy with me mostly doing stuff for other people…but that’s okay. Recently I decided to join a gym because due to my unemployed life having a personal trainer was draining my bank account. What’s most exciting to me about my new gym membership is the classes you know – BOOTCAMP, ZUMBA, SPIN just typing that made me SMILE!!! I really love exercising and its one of the few times I am happy about sweating cause that means I’m working. For the life of me I cannot understand how someone who goes to the gym complains about sweating or says its nasty well girl think of it this way you aren’t sweating, you are sparkling – hope that helps!

&&

There is one class, this ONE class that I wasn’t always interested in but with knowledge comes awareness. I had previously done one yoga class before and complained I felt like I wasn’t doing anything (because in my mind I need to sweat).

But thanks to the yoga gawds who somehow managed to make me interested so much that I attended a class this week, and really went in with an open mind, and I am happy to report I will be attending next week.

I’m super excited about getting into a headstand and all those fun looking poses lol.

I’m getting off track here…

I simply want to remind you that no matter how busy you get, you must take the time out to take care of yourself because as my Yogi (that’s what a yoga teacher is called right?) said “you have to take care of yourself because no on else is going to do it for you”

So take the time to get a massage, go for a walk, meditate, anything you need to do for you!

XOXO,

Dani

What is For YOU… IS FOR YOU!!

Image

I saw this post on Instagram && HAD to share cause it spoke to me so much.

@Doc_Smartin says:

” Your package has shipped has to be one of the most confidence boosting sentences ever created. After you get that notice in your email, it comes as no surprise to you when you see that package turn up at your doorstep. How would you live your life differently if you knew that you were guaranteed something, that it was absolutely yours to have, that it would belong to you and no one else, and if you knew the exact future date that thing would be delivered into your life?

Its easy to wait for something that you know is on it’s way. Faith is knowing that “your package has shipped” even without notice, a sign, an email, a call, or a delivery date. There’s tremendous peace in knowing that the right won’t pass you by. Let that notion empower you, not with arrogance but with assurance. IT’s. YOURS.”

For me this just reminds me that worrying won’t ever change an outcome to a situation. Once I have prayed and believed all I can do is accept. I should be confident that if it is for me I will get it, and if not- it was not mine.

So as i’m interviewing for jobs and stuff, though it can be frustrating i’m confident knowing that the way my God is set up, I will get the job that is meant for me. All in due time.

XOXO,

Dani

Can we live?

Image

Happy Monday!

&&

Really I mean it HAPPY MONDAY!

I had a great weekend and having attended Curls&cocktails in NYC this weekend hosted by the energetic, bubbly and ever so welcoming Kenya (Halfietruths on instgram) has a lot to do with it!

&&

The meat of the matter stems from my attending this event so here goes…

I’m extremely grateful for the friends I have because if its one thing they do is let me know exactly how I feel. They pretty much ripped me a new one this weekend and complained “Dani always hanging with her natural hair friends” (keep in mind this is only my third outing to an event of such. But it gets better… “she left us”, “our hair isn’t big enough”,“all my likes are really dislikes and jealousy by the way”, “I’m about to block her natural obsessed ass (hating)”

&&

So here I am asking for a pass, a freebie, pleasseeee? Allow me, us, all my curlfriends and naturalistas to embrace our hair and be proud, we have a lot of making up to do because for years, for generations, forever! Society told us that our hair was not “pretty” or “good”. They had us yearn for perms even when our parents tried to tell us no, then we wore them down and gained silky straight hair but for what? To endure chemical burns, severe heat damage, hair that smells burned all the time and fear of going into the pool at a pool party.

We are out here making connections with others who we are able to relate to, we are all trying to figure out our hair, events like these gives us the platform to enjoy, embrace each other as well as learn and ask for help.

&&

No, I haven’t ditched my friends but I have ditched my perm. My hair and I, we are in a committed relationship and we’re having fun!

Xoxo,

Dani

Too Dependent?

Image

Remember the days before the prevalence of gps’s and tablets? When our parents actually drove to someone’s house without the help of Siri? I sure do and in my reminiscing I found myself amazed; so much that I wonder if we have become too dependent on such things. Now I know the world is developing rapidly and with that comes new advances. But when I find myself using the gps to go somewhere literally 5 mins away from my home, I cant help but think maybe I am not using my brain enough. Why is my first instinct to plug in the address into my phone? I could simply think of the location and easily get myself there, but there’s something about the comfort I get when I am being told by a gps where to turn.

Recently my phone charger stopped working, that was like my third one, but that’s a story for another time… so yeah my phone is dead, the store isn’t open yet and my mom needs me to take her to the hospital as well as pick her up when she is finished. Here I am telling myself okay I can get there without my phone, I mean I had no choice.

&&

The scene went like this… mom drove to the hospital, I drove home ran some errands then she says she is ready and what do I do? Wake my God-sister up so she could come with me and I use her phone to get to the hospital. I was not in any way comfortable with trying to go on my own, I am not pleased with myself because at any point technology can stop working and then what? Will my brain be able to help me or will it fail me?

&&

Another flaw I have with all this technology- our communication methods! So many messages are interpreted incorrectly, resulting in unnecessary arguments and such.

We also tend to “keep in contact” differently. I have a friend who we basically grew up together and my grandma and her mom are really close friends to this day. My grandma often ask “ Have you spoken to Ashlee?” and my response many times goes like this “yeah, well not really but you know we see each other on Instagram and we comment or like each others pics”

&&

I think that is such a poor excuse for communicating. Its not because I don’t have her number but I guess despite how easy it is to send a text, its much easier to “like” her picture.

XOXO

Dani